


gentle waves and heartbreak

by Franks22



Series: let the seasons begin [2]
Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Aftermath of forced bonding, Alpha Kageyama Tobio, Alpha Oikawa Tooru, Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, And it's probably only going to get worse., Forced Bonding, Hinata is having a very bad day., M/M, Omega Hinata Shouyou
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-11
Updated: 2020-07-21
Packaged: 2021-03-04 20:21:12
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 10,233
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25202350
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Franks22/pseuds/Franks22
Summary: And it’s in her embrace that it finally hits him, really. He’s fifteen, still only half a year into his presentation, and he’s already bonded. Already tied to an alpha that could make his life a living hell on the slightest whim if he so decided.Shouyou faces the consequences of his forced bond with Oikawa.
Relationships: Hinata Shouyou/Kageyama Tobio, Hinata Shouyou/Oikawa Tooru
Series: let the seasons begin [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1825738
Comments: 40
Kudos: 326





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> So, the various comments I've received asking for more has finally broken me down enough to sit and write this! 
> 
> I want to say thank you so much for every kudos and comment, I really appreciate every single one and I'm honestly surprised at the positive response I received for ABDCOGB, I definitely wasn't expecting it!
> 
> Anyway, I've now had a proper think about this, and I've made an outline for the next few parts of this series (yes, I'm actually making a series out of this, surprising how much a few nice words from readers can get your arse in gear!), annnnddd this and the next are gonna be a bit angsty, but then the last few are gonna be the comfort, because apparently even I can't be cruel all the time. 
> 
> I hope you enjoy it, I'm sorry if the writing is slightly different to the first part, but it's been a while and I think my writing has changed a little in the interim? I dunno. Times are strange.

This couldn’t be happening.

They’d won. Karasuno had won. They’d done it, finally beaten Seijoh, finally beaten _Oikawa_ , and-

Shouyou shuddered, his hand shaking as he gripped tightly at his neck, the slick slide of blood between his fingers warm.

What is he supposed to do? This shouldn’t have happened. He was supposed to be in the teams changing rooms, celebrating their victory and looking forward to their final match set for tomorrow, but he can barely breathe, a tightness in his chest holding with a vicelike grip around his heart and lungs.

He stands on shaky legs, grabs a handful of tissues from the nearest stall before slowly making his way over to the row of sinks.

When he looks up at his reflection, he barely recognises himself, his bright hair lifeless, hanging in sweaty streaks across his forehead, his skin pale and shiny.

He can’t look up into his eyes, can’t bring himself to see the expression there, and instead looks at the hand still clamped against his scent gland, dread and morbid curiosity at war with each other at what he’ll find beneath his slim fingers.

There’s blood drying in the creases of his knuckles, a stark, cloying stream of it running to the collar of his uniform, the stain barely noticeable but on the pale orange accents.

He takes a deep breath, braces himself and pulls his hand away.

He can’t stop the short barking sob that wrenches past his throat.

It’s large, grotesque.

He can just make out each individual crescent of his Alp- of _Oikawa’s_ teeth.

The skin around his gland is raised, an angry red, and he can feel the heat of the mark as he tentatively fingers the edges of each imprint with a shaking hand.

He runs the tissues under the tap, squeezing away the excess water before gently bringing it up to cover the mark, sighing in relief as the cool compress soothes the burning ache.

There are tears clinging to his lashes and he can feel the cool streaks slowly drying on his flushed cheeks and he doesn’t know what to do now. With this mark. With this bond. With this link to a boy he doesn’t know, he doesn’t love.

And his mind flashes to Kageyama. To the look of surprise and happiness on his face once the final ball had been spiked, a point in their favour.

Shouyou can’t take away that happiness now. Can’t bring himself to ruin a day the team has worked so hard for. He’ll just have to sort it out himself.

He stands in front of the mirror, breathing deeply to calm himself, closing his eyes and trying to forget,

The bleeding stops completely only moments later, and after a few wipes of the tissues the blood has mostly been washed away. There’s nothing he can do about the raised gland, but he pulls his jacket on tightly, zips it all the way up to his chin, cringing as it brushes against the sensitive skin around the mark.

He steels himself, takes one last look at his pale face, and prays that the team will be too excitable, too happy with their win, to notice the red marks around his eyes and the way he can’t quite get the tremors in his arms to _stop_.

It’s mayhem in the changing room when he finally makes his way into the room, edging through the door as quietly as he can, Tanaka and Nishinoya are near bouncing off the walls, and usually he’d be right there with them, shouting and laughing and basking in the glow of their win.

Instead, he quietly makes his way to his things, hunching his shoulders and trying to ignore the twinge of pain the movement causes against his neck as he pulls out his deodorant and scent blockers, spraying them both liberally and laughing off his teammates exaggerated coughing.

It takes a while for the team to calm down enough to finish getting out of their sweaty uniforms and back into their training gear, but they finally make their way outside to the bus, Shouyou keeping to himself as much as he can. 

When Shouyou climbs the steps, he can see Kageyama waiting in his usual spot, the seat next to him left empty for Shouyou, and he raises his eyebrow and a quick flash of hurt passes over his features when Shouyou sits down at the front of the bus instead, putting his bag next to him to stop anyone else sitting in the spare seat.

He’ll talk to Kageyama, explain it to him properly, but right now, his hearts beating double time in his chest, and each inhale _hurts_ as it burns its down his throat and he just-

He can’t right now. Can’t face his team, can’t look into his boyfriend’s eyes and tell him what’s happened.

They have their team meeting once they’re back at the school, and time passes by Shouyou in a haze. He needs to listen, needs to make note of the enemy they’re set to face tomorrow, but he feels like he’s drifting, like he’s on a boat and he can’t quite get his legs right under him. He sits in silence, let’s coach Ukai’s words wash over him in gentle waves, and barely notices when his head starts to tilt.

Kageyama catches him before he manages to fall fully, and a rush of unease passes through Shouyou at the contact, at the look of concern on Kageyama’s face.

“You ok, idiot?” He says, and the insult is harsh but his tone soft. There’s a crease between his brows, and usually Shouyou would reach up and smooth it out, trail soft fingertips over his sleek brows, but he scrambles to sit up properly, dislodging Kageyama’s hand from his shoulder and hunching in on himself instead. 

“Mm, I’m fine!” Shouyou manages to squeak out, praying that the break in his voice isn’t noticeable, “The game took more out of me than I thought it would.”

“Which is exactly why I’m cutting the meeting now,” Ukai says, interrupting them, and Shouyou doesn’t think he’s ever been so grateful, “I want you all to get home, get a good meal down you and then get to bed.”

Ukai shoots both Kageyama and Shouyou a sharp look, raising his brows in a stern expression that looks more at home on their parents faces than their youthful coach.

“No extra practice, guys. I mean it!”

Shouyou nods, hears Kageyama murmur out a quiet _ok_ that Shouyou knows actually means, "I’m gonna do it anyway" and usually Shouyou would be there with him, ready and raring to get in a few more spikes before actually going home but tonight…tonight he feels wrung out, feels his head thumping, a pulsing headache setting in behind his eyes. 

When his teammates all start to get up and leave, Shouyou rushes out to his bike.

He manages to hold himself together for the journey home, leaving his bike in a fallen mess near his front door as he throws off his shoes and makes his way to his bedroom, mumbling out a quick good night to Natsu and his mum.

He thinks he’s gotten away with it too, until he hears a soft knock on his door as he’s taking off his socks.

“Shouyou?” His mum says, softer than he’s heard in a long time, “Are you ok?”

And maybe it’s the tone, so unlike the usual shouts that seem to reverberate around his house courtesy of not only him, but his mum and sister too, or maybe the day is just finally catching up to him, but when he tries to reply, plastering on a facsimile of a smile on his lips, he can’t quick stop the sob that comes out instead.

His mum opens the door, eyes wide in alarm, and she’s over on the bed and hugging him tightly before he’s even managed to take a shuddering breath.

“Shouyou, darling, what’s wrong?” She asks, and he can’t look her in the eye, can’t bring himself to lift his head from where it’s tucked tightly under her chin, so he shakes his head instead, “I thought you won! I saw it on the news with Natsu earlier.”

“M-mum,” He manages to cough out between wracking sobs, “I-I don’t know what to d-do!”

“Baby, shh, it’s ok. Calm down,” She says as she rubs a hand firmly down his back, the comforting weight giving him something to centre himself with, “Take some deep breaths and tell me what happened, ok?”

It takes a while to calm down, panic and fear blurring the edges of his vision, but he manages it eventually, shuddering slightly with the few last hiccupping sobs.

He sighs once it’s over. His face feels hot where it rests against the smooth skin of his mother’s neck, and he takes a few deep breaths of her calming scent, the fresh spring notes that have always felt like home, and lets it wash over him in soothing waves before he finally pulls back, scrubbing an arm across his face to rub away the lingering tears.

He braces himself then, unzipping the jacket he’s still not taken off, and he jumps slightly when he hears his mother’s horrified gasp.

“Oh, Shouyou.” She says, voice barely a whisper as she raises a hand to the mark before changing her mind and taking hold of his own hand instead, “Oh, my darling. What happened? Who did this to you?”

He can’t look her in the eye when he explains what Oikawa did, what he _said_ , can’t bring himself to look up and see the disappointment and fear he knows will be etched deep into the lines of her face, but the hand wrapped tightly around his own grounds him.

She pulls him into another tight embrace when he’s done, and he wraps his arms around her back and clings with shaking limbs as she gently rocks the two of them, pressing soft kisses into the mess of his curls. 

And it’s in her embrace that it finally hits him, really. He’s fifteen, still only a little under a year into his presentation and he’s already bonded. Already tied to an alpha that could make his life a living hell on the slightest whim if he so decided.

Because Shouyou’s heard the horror stories. Had grown up with adults talking about the dangers for young omegas, of forced bonds and ruin lives. But he’d never given it much thought back then, had never really listened and _understood_ , because he was sure he’d be a beta, like his mother and father both, and wouldn’t have to worry about wayward alpha’s snatching him up and taking him away.

Once he’d presented, late last summer, he still hadn’t really thought about the danger he could be in, too busy learning and practicing and jumping and spiking, too busy thinking about a future on a court with teammates and _friends_. 

But he understands now, with the dull ache of the mark on his neck. Understands that if Oikawa wanted, Shouyou could be removed from school, from his team, and forced to live with the alpha, bear his children and spend the rest of his life a slave to his instincts.

“W-what am I going to do, mum?” He says, voice barely a whisper with how sore his throat is, and he feels the arms around him tighten slightly, feels a firm kiss press against his temple. 

“I don’t know, darling,” She replies, and the hopelessness in her tone settles heavy in Shouyou’s stomach, “I don’t know.”


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It gets worse before it gets better.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter number has increased by one, because I prefer little chapters, and I need a nap.

Shouyou sleeps uneasily that night. 

His head throbs in the aftermath of his breakdown and his throat is sore, but his mum tucks him under his covers, bringing the quilt up to his chin and smoothing out the wrinkles in the sheet before gently brushing back the hair over his forehead and leaving him with a warm kiss between his brows just like she had a thousand times in his childhood. Her eyes are as red-rimmed and sore as his own as she quietly closes his door with a muted click. 

He wakes the next morning to a tugging in his chest, body thrumming with an energy that doesn’t feel like his own and it takes him a moment, longer than he’d like to admit, to remember the events of yesterday, to remember the bond that now tethers him to Oikawa. 

His scent has changed too, he notices when he takes in a shuddering breath to calm himself down. His usual bright mix of sunshine and summer is muted slightly, hints of storms and rain tinging at the edges, and it unsettles him, to have a part of him he’s grown so used to since his presentation to suddenly be so different, so foreign to his senses. 

He refuses to cry though. Refuses to act like the stereotypical hysterical omega that everyone seems to expect him to be as soon as they find out his orientation.

It’s not ideal. It’s not even close to what he wants. But as much as he’d like to bury himself under the covers and wallow, he’s got a match that afternoon against the strongest team in their prefecture and no forced bond is going to stop him from going out there and proving to everyone just how strong omega’s can really be.

He dresses quickly in his practice uniform, zipping his jacket up to the chin and taking in his reflection with a critical eye. 

It’s obvious he’s tired, obvious that he’d spent a large portion of his evening bawling, but it’s not enough that his teammates will notice, he doesn’t think. They’ve got bigger things to worry about than their resident decoy looking a little worse for wear anyway. They’ve got Ushijima to defeat, a titan king to knock off his throne.

Shouyou doesn’t linger at home, eating his breakfast quickly, already thinking about the game. His mother left early with Natsu, but there’s a note on the kitchen table with well wishes from the both of them, and Shouyou smiles as he makes his way to his bike to start the journey across the mountain to get to school.

Shouyou hears his teammates before he sees them, can hear Tanaka and Nishinoya shouting as they usually do, and Tanaka-sensei’s worried babbles about disturbing the relative peace of the morning with their outbursts and as Shouyou swings his bike round the corner into the schools courtyard he feels something settle in him. 

His life may have turned on its axis, but his teammates, his friends, they’re still the same. 

“HINATAAAAAA!” Nishinoya shouts when he spots Shouyou locking up his bike, running over to him and bouncing up and down with an energy that belies the hellish match they had against Aoba Johsai, “We gonna do this?!”

Shouyou laughs, jumping in tandem with his upperclassman, and there’s a bubbling happiness in him now, in his teams company. 

“You bet, Nishinoya-senpai!” He says with a bright smile, “We’re gonna take down Ushijima!”

“Of course we are,” Tanaka says as he grabs both Shouyou and Nishinoya around the neck, bringing them in to a rough embrace that Shouyou can’t help but try to savour, “They’re not gonna know what’s hit ‘em!”

Shouyou stays close to Tanaka and Nishinoya as they wait for the few straggling members of the team to turn up, admittedly trying to avoid Kageyama as much as he can.

It feels strange, not to be in Kageyama’s company, not passing back insults and encouragements as easy as breathing, but when Shouyou had seen his boyfriend turn up to the school, scowl in place on his face as usual, he couldn’t bring himself to breach the distance between them, could feel the tug in his chest linking him to another alpha and felt unmoored and unsteady.

He’ll talk to Kageyama about it, he will. But not yet. Not now. There’s a match to win first.

They meet Ushijima outside of the gym and his burning desire to beat him, to prove himself, pushes away any lingering worry he has over his bond and the conversation he needs to have with Kageyama. 

He and Kageyama make their way over to Shiratorizawa’s ace, and Shouyou feels brave, feels like he can take on anyone and anything when he has Kageyama at his side.

“Let’s meet on the court.” Ushijima says before turning around and walking away, and Shouyou shivers in excitement, desperate to get inside and get on the court.

“Damn, I wanna hurry up and fight him!” He says, and he sees Kageyama smile out of the corner of his eye, a small lift of his lips that Shouyou knows means he’s just as excited, just as desperate to get the game started as Shouyou is. 

It’s quiet in the changing room once they get inside to change, the excitement from outside making way for nerves as the minutes tick closer to the match, so it’s startling when Tsukishima speaks aloud after Shouyou has removed his jacket to put on his match uniform. 

“What the hell is that?”

And Shouyou doesn’t know what he’s talking about until he feels Tsukishima stand next to him, eyes narrowed as he looks at the newly visible mark on Shouyou’s neck.

And it’s funny really, how very easily Shouyou had forgotten about it. How naturally he’d taken off his jacket without a care. 

His eyes widen as he scrambles to pull his jacket back up his arms, sweat breaking out at the nape of his neck as all his teammates turn at Tsukishima’s outburst.

“Nothing! It’s nothing!” Shouyou manages to say, dread settling in his stomach like stones as Kageyama crowds against his back, “I fell on my way home last night, it’s fine!”

Kageyama pulls away his jacket before Shouyou manages to put it back on, and with almost gentle hands he tilts Shouyou’s head, making him grimace at the slight tug on the healing mark. 

Kageyama’s breath stutters against Shouyou’s face and his hand moves away as if it’s been burned once he’s managed to take a proper look and Shouyou closes his eyes tightly, biting his trembling lips before he can come up with more useless excuses, because it’s obvious. Of course it is. His gland is still raised and red, warm to the touch, and the imprint of Oikawa’s teeth are stark white against his flushed skin. 

“What the fuck.” Kageyama whispers.

It’s the profanity that makes Shouyou open his eyes in shock, because Kageyama doesn’t swear. Can barely even manage actual insults worse than what a pre-schooler could come up with even at his most irritated. 

Shouyou regrets opening his eyes as soon as he looks at Kageyama’s face. He’s as pale as Shouyou had been the previous day, looking at himself in the bathroom mirror.

“Hinata, what happened?” Shouyou hears someone say, but he doesn’t pay them any mind, can’t take his eyes off Kageyama because he thinks his heart might be breaking. There’s anger in Kageyama’s eyes, but there’s hurt too, and his thin lips are pressed in a tight line that Shouyou wants to kiss away. 

The team are all close now, all crowding around Shouyou to take a look at his neck, and it pushes Kageyama back, away from Shouyou’s reach. 

“Holy shit, is that a _mating_ bite?” Tanaka shouts before letting out an excited whoop.

“Congrats Hinata, Kageyama. Bit premature, if you ask me, but if you know, you know, right?” Sugawara says with a bright laugh and Shouyou would laugh too, would laugh loud and bright and happy if it were true. If it were Kageyama’s mark pressed into his neck. But it isn’t. It won’t ever be, not now. 

“It isn’t mine.” Kageyama says, and there’s no emotion in his voice, no anger or frustration or-or _anything_ and Shouyou flinches. 

“What?” Sawamura says as he looks between the two of them, brows pinched in confusion, “But I thought you guys were-“

“Obviously not.” 

Kageyama turns to leave, and Shouyou panics, pushing past his upperclassman to grab hold of Kageyama’s arm with a shaking hand, pleading with desperate eyes because he needs to understand. He needs to know. Shouyou didn’t want this. Doesn’t want it. 

“Please, Kageyama.” He says as he tightens his grip, “Please. I’ll explain everything, I will. I promise. But I can’t right now, ok?”

Kageyama doesn’t say anything, only pushes Shouyou’s hands away and turns around, leaving the room in a few short strides.

It’s quiet again once the door slams shut behind him and tears form in Shouyou’s eyes, because this wasn’t supposed to happen, not right now. 

“Hinata?” He hears Sawamura say as Shouyou makes his way back to the bench, sitting down heavily next to his bag, “If it isn’t Kageyama’s then who…?”

Shouyou laughs then. But it isn’t bright. It isn’t happy either. It rips out his throat in a bitter bray and he wants to scream, just a little bit. Wants to shout, and hit something. Wants to tear at his skin and pull out his _heart_ because this is- he’s – this- this _wasn’t supposed to happen_.

He laughs and laughs and laughs and it turns into a raw sob that tears at his throat and _stings_ but he deserves it, he _revels_ in it.

“Hinata!” 

“What’s wrong with him?”

“He needs to calm down!”

He can hear his teammates panicking around him, can feel hands on his back and his arms, and there’s movement all around him but he doesn’t care, can’t bring himself to worry that he’s breaking down in front of his team. 

“What the HELL is going on in here?” Ukai says as he comes rushing into the room, and Shouyou looks up then, tears still streaming down his face. 

Ukai takes one look at his expression and rushes over, panic in his eyes as he frantically looks over Shouyou’s arms and legs.

“What happened, what’s wrong?” He asks as he pulls at Shouyou’s hands in turn, checking for injuries, "Are you hurt?”

Shouyou cries harder at that. Because he is, isn’t he? He’s hurt. He’s hurting. But it’s not a broken arm or a sprained wrist or a fever, even. It’s inside, and that kind of injury can’t be fixed so easily. Can’t be set back together with a cast or washed away with a tablet. 

“Coach, he’s fine.”

Is he though? 

Shouyou doesn’t think he is. 

“Man bun, explain. Now.” Ukai says as he looks to Shouyou’s left, still not taking his hands off Shouyou’s arms.

“He’s got a m-mating bite,” Azumane stutters out and Shouyou flinches when Ukai turns back to him with wide eyes. 

“Hinata? Is that true…“ He trails off when he sees the mark on Shouyou’s neck, his hands dropping from Shouyou’s arms, “….well, shit.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Kudos and comments are very much appreciated, but you do you.
> 
> See you next time,  
> Franks22


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I keep adding chapters, but the next one really will be the last!

Ukai sighs heavily, slumping back to rest on his heels as he scrubs a hand roughly down his face.

“Right. Ok.” He says to himself under his breath, and Shouyou tenses slightly at the tone. He sounds angry, and frustrated, and Shouyou is at least ninety percent sure it’s aimed at him.

Shouyou’s surprised then, when Ukai looks up at him with surprisingly soft eyes.

“I’m not gonna ask what happened, or who that mark belongs to,” Ukai says with a nod towards Shouyou’s neck, “It’s got nothing to do with me, or the rest of the team-“

He says the last bit a little louder, with a pointed look around them both, and Shouyou sees a few of his teammates tense slightly at the barely concealed reprimand.

“However, I do need to ask Hinata, are you gonna be ok playing today? If not, I’ll need to have a think about our options-“

“I’m fine!” Shouyou says loudly, his sobs have petered off in the face of Ukai’s concern, but his voice still breaks when he speaks, “I swear. I can play. I _have_ to play.”

Ukai sighs again, relief mixed with a little doubt, scrutinising Shouyou’s face with a shrewd look of disbelief.

“Are you sure?” He asks, waving a hand in Shouyou’s general direction, “Because this is kinda telling me you’re not.”

“I am! I swear. I just- I just needed to get it all out. I’m ok to play. I’ll be fine.” Shouyou says again, scrubbing an arm across his face to get rid of any lingering tears. Not playing today simply isn’t an option, it would take him actually losing a limb to stop him from going on that court.

Shouyou knows the rest of the team are looking at him dubiously, but Shouyou _knows_ himself, knows what will happen if he doesn’t take his mind off the absolute shit show that his personal life has recently turned into. The best thing for him to do now is get out on that court and do what they came here to do. He’s not sure he’ll be able to cope if he gets taken off the starting line-up. That might just be the straw that’ll break the camel’s back, as the saying goes.

“I’ll take your word for it, Hinata,” Ukai says, “But you need to calm down and get your head screwed on, okay? If this is gonna be too much for you to handle, I wont hesitate to take you off the court.”

It’s frightening really, the thought of being taken out of a game when he’s gotten so used to being there, gotten so used to spending the majority of the game on the court with his teammates surrounding him. Even back in middle school, as the only official member of the team for the first year, he’d been guaranteed a spot out on the court. It’s a sobering thought and Shouyou can feel some of his earlier panic receding a little, letting him finally take a few deep, calming breaths. 

He’ll make sure he’s able to stay on the court for as long as he’s physically able. He won’t let his emotions force him to the bench. 

The only real issue is Kageyama. 

He’s their setter, the real backbone of the team, and if he’s not able to play…if he refuses to play with Shouyou…well, the team doesn’t stand a chance.

But Shouyou knows Kageyama too, almost as well as he knows himself. And just like with Shouyou, Kageyama isn’t likely to let personal issues off the court jeopardise the team’s success. 

“Coach,” He hears Sawamura say from somewhere behind him, “Kageyama…someone needs to find Kageyama and check that he’s alright.”

“Right,” Ukai says with a weary sigh, “Hinata, everyone, we’ll sort this all out later, ok? But for now, finish getting changed and get out there and warm up. We’ve got a hell of a match coming up and I need all of you to concentrate. I’ll go find Kageyama.”

He leaves then, and the room is silent for a few moments as if no one quite dares to speak. Shouyou takes a deep breath, squaring his shoulders before looking at each of his teammates in turn. 

They’re worried. It’s obvious in the furrowed brows and pinched lips on each of their faces. 

“Guys,” Shouyou says, voice more steady and sure than he thinks he’s managed since his run in with Oikawa the previous day, “I’m sorry. But I can’t do this right now ok? I know you’ve got questions, and I swear I’ll tell you everything you want to know, and I’m really sorry you had to see…all of that, but…we need to get out there and- and beat Ushijima and win our ticket to nationals, ok? Everything else can wait.” 

He knows the wheels are turning in every one of his teammates heads, knows that they’ll be connecting the dots. He didn’t have a mark on his neck at their game yesterday, so it’d obviously happened since then, and with Kageyama denying it being his, the list of potential alphas it could be has definitely shortened, and it doesn’t exactly take a genius to realise that it wasn’t exactly consensual, with the way Shouyou had broken down.

Shouyou knows it’ll take just one of them working it out for the whole day to go completely to shit, and Shouyou _can’t_ let that happen, can’t ruin the teams chance of finally getting to nationals because of a mistake he’d made.

“Seriously,” He says firmly, “I’m ok. I’m going to be ok. The only thing I need you guys to do is get out there and play your best. Please?”

Guilt flashes across Tanaka and Azumane’s faces, and Shouyou sees their captain steel himself before walking into the centre of the room, arms crossing over his chest.

“Hinata’s right.” He says, his usual authoritative tone broking no argument, “Get ready and get out there. We got a monster to defeat after all.”

The team disperses then, going back to their own spots around the room, but it’s still so quiet, still so unnaturally tense in the room that Shouyou finds himself getting changed as quickly as he can and leaving before anyone else. He knows as soon as the door closes behind him that his teammates will talk, but as long as they leave it in the changing rooms and don’t bring it out onto the court, Shouyou can’t bring himself to be angry about it.

They care for him, of course they do. Even without being the only omega on the team, Shouyou has become a valued teammate and friend over the last few months. They’ve all grown exponentially since the first years joined the team, and they’ve done that together, forming bonds that are sure to last well past their time together as members of their volleyball club. And Shouyou cares for them just as much, and he’s angry at himself, at Oikawa, at the world and the universe and the _gods_ , for letting this all happen during their final chance at going to nationals as a team. He’s hurting his teammates, making them worry about him and now really _isn’t the time_. 

He’s thankful at least though, that they don’t know the whole truth yet, because Shouyou knows deep down that it is going to hurt them far worse when they find out what really happened. They’ll feel guilty for not protecting him, as if he’s incapable to looking after himself, and Shouyou really doesn’t want to see the looks on their faces when he tells them.

He makes his way through the corridors leading to the court, and he can hear the crowd long before he makes it to the entrance. It’s a low deep din, the sound of hundreds of people all chatting with each other, excited about the match, at seeing an old powerhouse take on the current number one team in the prefecture, and Shouyou lets the noise rush over him, lets it settle deep and push away the thoughts of what’s going to happen after, of what’s already happened this morning. 

He needs a clear mind for this game. 

He steels himself a final time before finally stepping into the main room, and his eyes widen when he looks around. It’s bright and loud and every bit as exciting as he always dreamed it would be. 

As he makes his way over to the wheeled cart filled to the brim with volleyballs, Shouyou sees Ukai come into the room and head to the bench where Takeda and Kiyoko are sat waiting. Shouyou strains to hear what’s said between the coach and advisor over the noise of their audience, and he tenses slightly when he hears Takeda asking what the hold up with the team is.

Shouyou sends out a silent thanks to Ukai when he replies with a simple _I’ll tell you later_.

Takeda is an emotional man at the best of times, and if he had even an inkling of what had transpired in the changing rooms, he’d be a wreck. It’s not something Shouyou feels he’s ready for, especially not as he lifts out a volleyball from the cart and turns around, only to come face to face with Kageyama.

“WOAH!” He shouts as he jumps back, clutching the ball against his chest with both hands, “Jeez, Kageyama, where’d you come from?”

Kageyama’s face is a carefully blank mask, but Shouyou has been able to read him like a book since their first meeting as teammates in the gym all those months ago. 

He’s angry, and hurt, and it stabs at Shouyou’s chest because _he_ did that, he’s the one that’s hurt Kageyama, made him feel angry and hopeless. He-

“I don’t understand what’s happened,” Kageyama says, surprising Shouyou, his voice low and even, “And I don’t really want to know, right now. I just need you to get out on that court and spike the balls I send to you.”

He walks away then, before Shouyou can manage to word a reply, and it’s not forgiveness, it’s not even understanding really, but it’s exactly what Shouyou needs.

The game comes first. It always has, for the two of them, and it probably always will.

Shouyou takes a deep breath, lets it out in a messy exhale, and makes his way onto the court proper. 

The rest of their teammates filter in then, making their way over to the pair of them warming up, and they’ve all, with the exception of the ever composed Tsukishima, got looks of wide-eyed excitement and disbelief on their faces. Shouyou watches with amusement as Yamaguchi gulps, face paling as he looks at the swelling crowd of spectators above them, and can’t help the small bark of laughter as even their captain fumbles with the ball he’d just tried to serve.

Shouyou’s not nervous, can’t seem to fit nerves in his body when it’s already filled to the brim with a thousand other emotions that he couldn’t name even if he tried. In a weird way, and he feels calmer in this moment than he ever has been before an important match and it’s not that he doesn’t care about the outcome, it’s not that he’s exactly confident in their chances to win or in his own abilities which still lack in so many ways, but he knows that no matter what happens, no matter how many curveballs they face from their near-unbeatable opponents, it’ll never be as bad as what he experienced in that bathroom the day before. 

He’s faced a demon he never knew to be wary of in the first place, and he’s still here, still standing on the court, ball in hand and ready to go. 

He throws the ball over to Kageyama, who’s already ready and waiting in position near the net, and takes off, sprinting to the net before spreading his arms and jumping, any lingering feelings of fear and doubt melting away as his eyes lock on to the perfect ball sent his way.


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ok, I’ll admit that maybe I just keep putting off writing the last chapter. But it’s hard!! I don’t wanna hurt my sunshine boys anymore, and I just know that I’ve gotta! 
> 
> I swear, next chapter is the DEFINITE last chapter of Hinata’s part, and then we’ll move on. 
> 
> I hope you like it!

The game is hard.

The team is an anxious mess for much of the first set, worries about Shouyou and the crowds and their opponents evident in every fumbled block and wobbly spike.

It’s also filled from start to finish with the most gruelling volleys that Shouyou has ever been a part of. 

From the beginning Shouyou feels like they’re desperately trying to catch up, and Shouyou is so angry, so frustrated, in himself and in the team because they can _do this_ , he knows they can, but they’re getting worked up and overwhelmed before they’ve even managed to hit solid ground.

It isn’t until Sugawara screams at them from the side-lines, face red and eyes frantic, that they finally take a moment to stop and _breathe_.

As one, they shake out tense arms and legs, unclench jaws, and relax.

The first point in their favour feels like a new beginning, a reset to the match, and they grab onto it with tight fists.

It’s still hard, still the toughest game that they’ve played to date, but without their doubts creeping in at the edge of their vision, they manage to keep the ball in play.

There’s no hesitation between Shouyou and Kageyama, and with every spiked ball Shouyou feels the ball of dread that settled heavy in his stomach sometime during their time in the changing room get that little bit lighter. Everything between them might be in question outside of this stadium, but between the four lines that make up their side of the court they’re the freak quick duo they’ve been since they first joined the team.

They win a set and they’re still in the running.

They overtake Shiratorizawa and Shouyou starts to think maybe…just maybe…

They’re tired. Their legs ache and there’s sweat on every brow and for a minute, for a short moment, air whistling as he takes in heaving gasps of air, Shouyou thinks that he can’t do this. He can’t win. They can’t win. There’s a weight on his body, a pressure from the other side of the court that he doesn’t think he can fight off, and his teammates do everything they can to claw their way back...but it doesn’t feel like _enough_

Ukai’s there to pick them up. To bolster them.

Volleyball is a sport where you’re always looking up.

They raise their eyes as one, shake limbs loose and settle back into practiced positions.

A ball whirls past Shouyou, hits Nishinoya’s arms with a stinging slap, but the balls still in play, it’s still in play and Kageyama’s in position, he’s _always_ in position, and Shouyou doesn’t need a signal, doesn’t need a sign from Kageyama because on the same side of the court, they move as one.

Shouyou jumps then, eyes open wide, and there’s a grin on his face and there’s a lightness in his chest that feels a little bit like hope, a little bit like _love_ , and he swings his arm and the ball hits his palm just as he always knows it will.

It hits the other side of the court and for a minute, Shouyou thinks he’s gone deaf.

There’s no sound around him for a single moment, until he feels arms and legs and chests against him, feels himself being brought tight into hugs from disbelieving teammates, and he can see his classmates in the stands jumping, can hear their screams and shouts and they did it. They really, _actually_ , did it.

Shouyou goes straight to the changing room on wobbly legs, doesn’t even glance at the bathroom located just a few metres away.

He wonders if he’ll always be scared of them now, if he’ll always be wary. 

The team is still excitable when they join him, Sawamura, Azumane and Sugawara all have red eyes and pinched cheeks, and everyone is still short of breath and red in the face, but it’s obvious they’re all so happy, all so thankful that they managed to pull it off.

Ukai and Takeda both enter too, and it’s then that Shouyou starts to feel _off_ , feels his hands start to shake and his breath come in shallow pants, because he doesn’t think he’s ready yet, with the adrenaline still pumping fast and heavy through his system from the match, doesn’t think he’d be able to form a coherent sentence, let alone tell everyone what happened.

Ukai takes one look at his face, and his features soften.

“Alright guys! Good game,” he says with a quick look around the room, “Everyone get changed and get on the bus. We’ll have a meeting when we get back to school.”

Shouyou sees a few furtive glances pass his way, but he busies himself with getting his deodorant and scent blockers out of his bag, trying to ignore the heavy weight of their stares.

The team all disperse then, Tanaka and Nishinoya talking loudly about the game, Tsukishima near collapsing on the bench beside Shouyou, cheeks still flushed from the match. 

Shouyou doesn’t see Kageyama, can’t bring himself to check on him now they’re off the court. He dresses quickly, doesn’t hang around the room for longer than absolutely necessary, and makes his way outside as soon as he can.

The bus ride back to the school is quiet, with most of the team falling asleep as soon as the engine whirs to life, but Shouyou still feels too keyed up, still feels a nervous energy buzzing through his veins. He glances around at his teammates, wonders what they’ll think when they know the truth, and his gaze meets that of Kageyama.

He’s sitting a few seats back, his bag on the seat beside him to block anyone else from sitting there, and he looks exhausted. He’d played well for the duration of the match, had made the team, and Shouyou, extremely proud, but it’s obvious that he’s desperate to sleep now. 

His eyes are bloodshot, and there’s a pinched furrow between his brows that Shouyou itches to smooth away with the calloused pad of his thumb, and his lips are in a tight line, the ends down turned the slightest bit. 

Shouyou feels his stomach lurch. He’d like nothing more than to sit beside him, take comfort in his warmth, wrap his fingers around Kageyama’s longer, more slender, digits. 

He’s the only alpha that Shouyou has ever felt the urge to get close to. He’s sure that a part of it is their shared love of volleyball, but he knows that a part of it is just his natural instincts too, the omega side of him seeking solace in an alpha in his prime. 

It’s not something they’ve ever really spoken about out loud, but neither of them had done anything to stop their burgeoning relationship. They’d graduated from high fives and back slaps to hand holding and hugs as easily as breathing, shared small, secret smiles with each other across classrooms and spent lunch hours tossing balls back and forth between them, bentos side by side beside them. 

It had only been a few months into their time at high school when Shouyou had found himself fingering the stitching on Kageyama’s sweater, left in a haphazard heap at the side of the training room, inhaling the alphas heady scent from the thick worn clothing, and Kageyama had seen him, his eyes going soft. The next day, he’d come to school in his spare sweater, putting the one covered in his scent into Shouyou’s bag to take home with him.

It was still all so new, still shy in a way Shouyou never really was, and knowing that that would have to end now, knowing that his body would no longer take comfort in the other boys scent, no longer crave the closeness they’d had for months now...he blinks back the tears that form in his eyes, turning away from Kageyama and hunching down in his seat. 

There’s nothing he can do to fix it, not really, and dwelling on the past, on what could have been, only makes the situation that much harder. 

He stifles the sob that threatens to break free and takes several deep breaths. 

There’s nothing he can do but continue to move forward.


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And that's a wrap (for this part of the series).
> 
> Sorry I took longer than I promised. Stuff got in the way, so.
> 
> There isn't actually much of Kageyama in this chapter, I'm mostly saving it all for the next part in the series, where we'll be exploring his thoughts on the whole thing, so I'm sorry in advance if you were hoping for a heart to heart between him and Hinata this chapter. 
> 
> Anyway, I hope you like it, and I hope you all stick with me while I get started on the next part of the series!
> 
> And I also want to say a massive thank you too, I've been really overwhelmed by the comments and the kudos and the hits this fic has received. I really appreciate each and every person that's taken the time to let me know what they think.
> 
> Anyway, have at it, and I'll see you soon!  
> Franks22

Shouyou feels sick. His hands are shaking as he clenches them tightly in his lap, palms slick and sweaty, and he can feel his breathing coming out in short, sharp pants. 

The team are silent, each of them looking confused and angry and upset and as the silence stretches on for several moments longer, Shouyou can’t help but work himself up into a panic, his scent souring.

This was a bad idea, telling the team. He should have been smarter, tried harder to hide the mark. The last thing he wants to do is trouble them, or worry them. Or worse still, have them see him for what he truly is – a weak omega.

He’s on the precipice of a full blown panic when the team cuts it off in its tracks as they finally seem to breathe as one, each of them understanding in turn, and once they do, it’s a raucous cacophony of shouts that has Shouyou shrinking back and hunching in on himself instead, panic abated but stomach still twisting with nerves.

“That absolute bastard-“

“I’ll kill him…can we-“

“How _dare_ he-“

This is exactly what he didn’t want, had been hoping to avoid. 

Yachi has tears in her eyes and Kiyoko looks vaguely nauseous, Ukai and Takeda-sensei both look resigned, and his teammates…his teammates are just so _angry_ and despite them all using strong scent blockers and deodorant before, during and after every team practice and official match, Shouyou can feel their heady scents slowly taking over the room, making his stomach roll uneasily as his head swims. 

Throughout it all, Kageyama stands at the back of the room, his face a careful mask of indifference, but Shouyou can tell by the slight rise of his shoulders, the way he can’t quite help but pull his hands into tight fists, that he’s anything but unaffected by it all.

Shouyou doesn’t get a chance to speak with him, doesn’t know if he’d want to even if he could, because what is there to say, really? That everything will be ok? That they can continue their relationship despite the bond that Shouyou now shares with another man? That they can ignore the way that Shouyou’s body will slowly become repulsed by the touch of someone other than his alp-than Oikawa? 

There’s no comfort that Shouyou can give, none that Kageyama would accept, so he watches silently as Kageyama leaves the gym without a word, unnoticed by anyone but Shouyou himself.

He thinks that watching Kageyama’s back as he walks away is just about the hardest thing he’s ever had to do. 

Nishinoya and Tanaka both burst up out of their seated positions and look ready to take off for Aoba Johsai and Shouyou’s focus goes straight to them, eyes widening in panic at the thought of them meeting up with Oikawa.

“Please! Please don’t,” Shouyou manages to say to them both, jumping up and rushing over to the two of them, “There’s nothing you can do-“

“There’s a fair few things we can do actually,” Tanaka says, and he sounds harsh, sharp in a way Shouyou has never heard before, his scent a bitter sting as it hits Shouyou’s senses, “We can go over there and beat the living _shit_ out of Oikawa, for starters.”

“It won’t change anything!” Shouyou insists, tugging on Tanaka’s arms to make him _listen_ , “It’s _done_. The mark’s there, the bond’s in place, there’s _nothing_ you, or I, or-or anyone can do about it!”

Shouyou’s breathing hitches, and there’s a tell-tale wetness to his eyes, but he’s cried enough the last few days. Refuses to let another single tear fall. He pushes away the hopeless feeling that grips tight at his throat, wills away the heavy lead he feels making its home in his stomach since Kageyama’s departure, and lets his own frustration take over instead, lets the helplessness be engulfed by his rage at the situation because it isn’t fair. He’s fifteen years old. His biggest worry should be getting better for their upcoming matches at nationals, not on his tenuous position in the volleyball team completely at the whim of an obviously unstable alpha from a rival team. 

“Shouyou,” Nishinoya says quietly, “This isn’t right. What he did to you…it goes against everything we’re taught!”

“You think I don’t know that? You think I wanted this?” Shouyou near hisses, his eyes narrowing slightly as he stares at Nishinoya head on. He doesn’t want to take this out on his team, on his friends, but he needs them to know, to understand. He hadn’t willingly laid back and let Oikawa take advantage of him, he’d be coerced and _attacked_ , and the last thing he needs is his alpha and beta teammates trying to protect him, or stick up for him or whatever it is that they’re trying to do. 

“No! Of course not! But we can’t let him get away with this!”

“He’s already gotten away with it!” Shouyou shouts, and Nishinoya and Tanaka both take an instinctive step back in the face of Shouyou’s anger, his scent spiking and combining with the volatile mix already polluting the air around them all. They both raise their hands in the universal sign of surrender, but it’s clear from both of their expressions that they’re still just as angry and frustrated as they were before Shouyou’s outburst. And Shouyou knows that maybe he’s being a bit too harsh, directing his anger at the wrong people, but his head is throbbing and there’s tension in his neck that’s tight and uncomfortable and his body still feels like an absolute jittery mess, and it’s frustrating, and he doesn’t understand it, so it’s easier to try to ignore it instead but-

“Boys,” Takeda says, clapping his hands once to get everyone’s attention. He looks serious, every bit the school teacher and advisor that he is, as he looks at each of them in turn before resting his gaze on Shouyou. There’s sadness in his eyes, and a flush high on his cheeks, but his voice is firm and steady, “What Oikawa-kun did is monstrous. But in Japan…it’s legal. As an alpha, he was completely within his right to claim an unmated omega, no matter circumstances. Legally, there’s nothing Hinata can do, and any kind of justice you try to enact on his behalf will only make the situation harder on him. Don’t let him watch his friends being punished for reckless behaviour. He’s been through enough.”

“That’s bullshit and you know it!”

“I know, and Hinata knows,” Takeda says with a sigh, “But that’s just how it is here. We’re all very well aware that being an omega doesn’t make Hinata _less_ than anyone else. He’s as strong and as smart and as talented as anybody else. But in the eyes of the government, in the eyes of many officials throughout the world really, omegas have always been thought of as those that need guidance and a firm hand. The alphas and betas in charge, the ones that set the laws, they’re not likely to change them when they themselves benefit from them so much.”

Nishinoya lets out a quiet _tsk_ before walking away, making his way to the storage room at the side of the gym. Azumane makes to get up and follow him, but Sawamura stops him with a hand on his arm and a shake of his head.

They all wince as the door is slammed shut, and wait with bated breath before they hear the unmistakable thud of a punched wall. 

Shouyou doesn’t blame him, he’d quite like to lock himself in a room and punch the crap out of everything he sees too, but he’s not entirely sure that he’d manage it, with the way his legs and arms feel like jelly, and the way his stomach keeps rolling in unsteady waves. 

Nishinoya comes back into the gym, scowl on his face still, but eyes a little less manic, and makes his way back over to Shouyou. 

“I’m sorry.” He says quietly, “I over-reacted. I know this isn’t your fault – I didn’t mean to make it sound like it was.”

If Shouyou had any room in his chest for anything but heartache at the minute, he’s pretty sure he’d be bursting at the seams with gratitude, but as it is, he simply gives Noya a small smile. 

“I know, Noya-senpai. I’m sorry too. This all just happened so suddenly, and with the finals today and the thought of the inter-high, I’ve not really had a lot of time to process everything. I’m a bit of a mess at the minute.”

“Which is completely understandable, Hinata.” Takeda says as he comes up to the two of them, resting a warm and comforting hand on Shouyou’s shoulder. It’s grounding, in a way, and Shouyou’s mind latches onto the contact as if it’s salvation. “It’s been a hectic few days. What we all need to do now is get home, get some good food in you, and get some rest. Everything always feels a little more manageable after a good night’s sleep, okay boys?”

They all nod their assent and the rest of the team walk away to gather their things, but Takeda keeps his hand firmly on Shouyou’s shoulder, stopping him from leaving with them.

“Coach Ukai is going to give you a lift home, ok Hinata?” He says softly, and it should rankle, that he’s being treated differently to his teammates, but the advisor’s scent is a soothing balm to his senses, and even Shouyou can admit that it’s highly likely he wouldn’t actually be able to manage a full-on bike ride across a mountain after the few days he’s had. 

Takeda steers him over to Ukai, who still hasn’t said much since this all came out, and gives Shouyou’s shoulder one last comforting squeeze before letting go.

The rest of the team shout their goodbyes to the three of them before leaving, and it’s quiet once they’ve gone, the gym so lifeless in comparison to how it usually feels and Shouyou can’t help but feel a little _off_ by it. 

Ukai clears his throat once they’re alone, and Shouyou’s eyes shoot up to meet his gaze. It’s obvious the coach wants to say something, and just as obvious that he’s unsure if he should. He huffs out a frustrated sounding breath before he speaks.

“Has Oikawa tried to contact you since?” He asks plainly, and there’s a shock of panic that runs through Shouyou at the mention of the alpha’s name, and he wonders if he’ll ever get to the point where hearing it doesn’t make him want to run away and hide under the heavy covers of his bed.

“No.” Shouyou replies softly, “He’s not messaged or called or anything. I don’t really understand. He was just so _angry_ a-and I know he can ruin my life, I know he _has_ in a way, but he _hasn’t_ , and I don’t understand.”

He’s shaking again, and he’s pretty sure at this point his insides must resemble scrambled eggs, and his face is flushed with heat but there’s a cold sweat smothering his skin and he’s pretty sure he’s going to hyperventilate at this point because there doesn’t appear to be any air in the room anymore, he’s not quite sure how the three of them are still all standing because surely humans need air to survive and there _isn’t any_ and-

“Shouyou! Hinata! Come on now, shhhh, calm down,” The hand is back on his shoulder again, comforting and warm and _grounding_ and he sucks in a noisy inhale that burns, blinking away the tears that have gathered at the corner of his eyes, “It’s ok. It’s going to ok. You just need to take some nice, deep breaths, alright? You’re panicking.”

He’s definitely panicking. He’s been panicking on and off for over 24 hours now. He’s a small ball of righteous anger and anxiety at the minute. He thinks that might be all he is. 

“Hinata!” Ukai says firmly, and for a split second Shouyou’s panic spikes, because he’s an _alpha_ , but the panic goes as quickly as it came, because he’s an alpha, but he’s also their teams coach, and Shouyou knows that there’s nothing on planet earth that could make the man treat Hinata the way Oikawa did. He’s an alpha, but he’s also a mentor, the one that pulled their team together and made them into the champions that they now are. It’s familial almost, the feeling between the coach and the team. Like an older brother that might seem gruff and uninterested, but is actually full to the brim with pride and hope. Despite his appearance, and the rough way he talks, in his presence Shouyou has never felt anything but _safe_. “It’s ok. It’s alright.” 

It’s quiet on the car ride home - Shouyou has been feeling progressively worse with every minute spent sitting and it’s clear that coach Ukai isn’t sure what to say, but as he parks up outside Shouyou’s house, he turns to the boy with a serious expression on his face.

“I know this probably isn’t going to mean much right now, but if there’s anything any of us can do, whether that’s me and Takeda-sensei, or any of your teammates, all you’ve got to do is ask, ok?” He says gently, “We’re always gonna be on your side.”

Shouyou manages a wobbly smile, eyes misting up again.

“Mm, I know coach, thank you, and thanks for the ride.”

He gets out of the car, dragging his heavy bag with him, and it feels like he hasn’t been home in forever, his quiet morning seeming almost years ago with how hectic and exciting and traumatic the day has been. 

Shouyou’s mum is at the kitchen table, a steaming mug of tea held tightly in her hands, and it’s obvious that Takeda had called ahead to let her know he was on his way home when he spots the waiting mug for himself opposite her.

“Hi darling,” She says gently, “How did it go?”

“We won,” Shouyou replies as he dumps his bag on the ground and makes his way over to the table, sitting down and taking a small sip of the soothing tea gratefully, “And I told the team.”

“I thought you might, you boys are so close.” She seems to hesitate then, second guessing what she wants to say, but she continues regardless, “And he’s not been in contact…?”

“No.” Shouyou replies with a shrug, “I’m not quite sure what the deal is to be honest. I’d have thought he’d have called or at least text by now. It’s weird. I don’t _want_ him to call, or text - in my head, at least - but my chest hurts, mum. And I’m…it’s as if my body is-is _waiting_ for him or something. I don’t like it.”

“Oh, sweetheart,” His mum says as her face crumples slightly, “It’s only natural. The bond…it’s settling in. This is the time you’d usually spend with your alpha, affirming the bond. Your body is probably at a bit of a loose end, being separated from him.”

“I don’t want to ‘affirm the bond’,” He says indignantly, “I don’t want to be anywhere near him!”

And he doesn’t. He’d be happy if he never saw Oikawa again for the rest of his life. But his body is betraying him, and Shouyou is sure that it’d be quite easy to hate himself for this. Hate his body for its traitorous craving of a boy Shouyou can’t stand. 

“I know you don’t, honey.” His mum says, placing a warm hand around where his own grips onto his mug, “But what you think you want, and what your body thinks you want, are two completely different things. We’ll need to get you to a doctor, really, and see what’s going to happen if that boy chooses to stay away.”

Shouyou shudders at that. The last time he’d been to a doctor had been shortly after he had presented. It had been an unpleasant appointment, to hear how much his body would be changing with his presentation. It’s not something he wishes to experience now that he’s got a bond. 

“Mum, I don’t want-“

“I know you don’t. I’d rather we didn’t have to take you either, but isn’t it best to be prepared? To know what might happen? It might affect your volleyball, and if we find out now, at least you and your coaches will be able to prepare yourselves for it, right?” 

They finish their tea in relative silence after that, and Shouyou makes his way out to the back garden, ball in hand. 

He still feels strange, still feels like his mind and his body are a second out of synch, but the frenetic energy that he’s had running through him since he woke up is still there, rippling under the surface, and despite how much he’d love to jump into bed and just sleep for a thousand years, he knows that he’s too keyed up right now. 

He throws the ball up in the air, catches it with slightly trembling fingers, and then repeats. 

He’s going at it for ten or so minutes when he hears the back door open behind him, and when he turns to see who it is, he’s face to face with Natsu. 

“Shouyou? Are you ok? Mum’s been acting weird and she won’t tell me what’s wrong.” She says, and her face scrunches up, lips wobbling, and Shouyou knows she’s a few seconds away from crying, and he feels guilt swim in sour circles in his gut.

He crouches down slightly, putting the ball on the floor beside him, and lifts his hand to gently ruffle his sisters messy locks.

“It’s ok, Natsu.” Shouyou says, voice steadier than he really feels, “It’s all gonna be ok.”

And he’s not really sure in that moment, with his heart beating heavy and hard in his chest, with his arms bone tired and his neck still aching, who exactly he’s trying to convince.

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading! There's one more chapter for this fic and then there'll be another part from someone elses POV (three guesses who). 
> 
> I'd love to hear what you think - though I'll ask for no concrit please, (I'm sensitive, ok?). 
> 
> Kudos and comments are always appreciated, but you do you!
> 
> Thanks,  
> Franks22


End file.
